The Parable of the Talents
“For it will be like a man going on a journey, who called his servants and entrusted to them his property. To one he gave five talents, to another two, to another one, to each according to his ability. Then he went away. He who had received the five talents went at once and traded with them, and he made five talents more. So also he who had the two talents made two talents more. But he who had received the one talent went and dug in the ground and hid his master's money. Now after a long time the master of those servants came and settled accounts with them. And he who had received the five talents came forward, bringing five talents more, saying, ‘Master, you delivered to me five talents; here, I have made five talents more.’ His master said to him, ‘Well done, good and faithful servant. You have been faithful over a little; I will set you over much. Enter into the joy of your master.’ And he also who had the two talents came forward, saying, ‘Master, you delivered to me two talents; here, I have made two talents more.’ His master said to him, ‘Well done, good and faithful servant. You have been faithful over a little; I will set you over much. Enter into the joy of your master.’ He also who had received the one talent came forward, saying, ‘Master, I knew you to be a hard man, reaping where you did not sow, and gathering where you scattered no seed, so I was afraid, and I went and hid your talent in the ground. Here, you have what is yours.’ But his master answered him, ‘You wicked and slothful servant! You knew that I reap where I have not sown and gather where I scattered no seed? Then you ought to have invested my money with the bankers, and at my coming I should have received what was my own with interest. So take the talent from him and give it to him who has the ten talents. For to everyone who has will more be given, and he will have an abundance. But from the one who has not, even what he has will be taken away. And cast the worthless servant into the outer darkness. In that place there will be weeping and gnashing of teeth.’
Now, I am not chronically ill. Never the less I only have so many spoons and so do you. Another way of saying this is I wear a lot of hats and some days, I just can't put on another on or I am unable to change the hat. I think you understand what I am sharing with you today. The "Want to" is there but the "I can" isn't. No excuse just sharing.
If this is your scenario, be kind to yourself. I run out of spoons some days before 9AM---seriously. It happens. Sometimes one spoon at a time at other times I just pitch them all. This morning I pitched them all before 8AM. When you are recovering from trauma of the past, remember healing is a process. For me I remind myself that I am not thirteen years old and that my four little brothers do not need me to care for them, they have very capable wives. I need to be present and take care of me. No guilt. No shame. No explanations needed. Just be.
ACTION STEP: You know the drill. Breathe. Be present. Pray. You've got this. Whatever comes your way, you will be sufficient and present the best you that you've got today. Tomorrow, we will face the day with a new perspective and a fresh body. So, if your still holding all your spoons then pray for me. And tomorrow if you need a spoon, well you can borrow one of mine.
I believe in you and you need to believe in yourself.