Gottman says that the number one thing that women are looking for in a man is not a six-figure bank account or six-pack abs. The number one thing women look for is trustworthiness. Trustworthiness does not simply mean martial fidelity in the strict sense though that is essential to trustworthiness. It is also much more than that. Trustworthiness means doing what you say you are going to do. It is about reliability & accountability.
Throughout human history, a woman’s safety and sense of inner well-being, as well as that of her children, have been dependent on her partner’s trustworthiness. Gottman: “Fathers are the most critical factor in the health and success of children. When fathers are not involved with their kids, there’s a five times greater likelihood that the kids will live in poverty, a three times greater likelihood that they will fail in school, and a two times greater likelihood that they will have emotional and behavioral problems, use drugs, get involved in crime, or commit suicide. You can see why trustworthiness is such a high value.”
Today we look at the #2 thing that women need: She wants and needs your sacrifice 5:25-27
Men, we have to admit, we’re pretty selfish, aren’t we? And our wives know this and they are helping us be more giving and serving. (Jeff Foxworthy video “women training men)
“Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave Himself for her 26 to make her holy, cleansing her with the washing of water by the word. 27 He did this to present the church to Himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or anything like that, but holy and blameless.”
Notice how the Holy Spirit led Paul to write this. Husbands, love your wives. There is the command. How did Jesus love the church? He gave Himself for her, for us. How did He give Himself for us? He allowed Himself to be bothered, burdened, beaten, and eventually bludgeoned to death on a Roman cross. Romans 5:8 amplifies: “But God proves His own love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us!”
Gentlemen, this is how we love our wives: we sacrifice for them. We take the lead in being bothered & burdened. We take the lead in the sacrifice department. I have never had a woman come to me yet who was contemplating divorce and say, “My husband loves me too much! He won’t stop serving me! Make him stop! I can’t take it any more!”
Guys, stop insisting on things being your way. Stop demanding she conform her desires to yours. Stop meeting your needs 1st. Look for ways to fulfill her needs. Defer to her desires. Every woman wants to know her man will give himself for her.
Just click here to register: https://www.eventbrite.com/e/marriage-seminar-2018-tickets-40111994054
I will be signing my new book. Some lucky couple will get their free copy. "Moments that Matter" is also available on Kindle as well as Amazon.
You can click her to get your copy now: https://www.amazon.com/Moments-That-Matter-Marriage-Devotional-ebook/dp/B079K6KVG4/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1517963419&sr=1-1&keywords=Moments+that+Matter