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Mentor and Mentee relationships #3

8/17/2018

This is the last in a four part series on the Mentor and Mentee Relationships. I am a protege of many more experience people, and I am a mentor to many as well. It has been my experience that these relationships can catapult you to where God would have you to be, much quicker than going it alone. I am grateful for all the people God has put in my life. I am blessed because of each relationship.

Mentoring refers to a developmental relationship between a more experienced mentor and a less experienced partner referred to as a mentoree (sometimes vernacularized into mentee) or protégé. It is a one-to-one relationship based on encouragement, constructive comments, openness, mutual trust, respect, and a willingness to learn and share.

It is up to the mentee or protege to do the pursuing. Jesus said, "Come follow me and I will make you..." He did not chase the ones He discipled. I have made the mistake in working harder than those that I have mentored. I do not do that anymore. If you want what I have, then it is your responsibility to come and get it.

I have also found that it needs to cost the mentee something. If we met for lunch for example, then I think the mentee should pick up the tab. I have picked up the tab for years, and all added up, I still got more than I paid for. Sometimes I got a college class in life, that was worth thousands.

The mentee should have an agenda and take notes while the mentor is speaking. Questions from the mentee help the mentor locate the mentee, and navigate him/her from point A to point B, quicker than trying to figure out what the mentee wants or needs. A good mentor is always listening to the Holy Spirit for direction and impartation, as to what God wants and needs him/her to deposit into the life of the mentee.

Mentees that do their assignments get another one. We learn by doing. I like the model, "See me do-You do-Then I tweak you-Then you do again and I watch you". In this form of mentoring trust is built because the mentor encourages and corrects and affirms. I was taught "ACE". This is where the mentor A-affirms or applauds, then C-corrects or challenges, and then E-encourages the mentee to try again or improve. The funny yet sad thing about this however, is that soon the mentee thinks when I affirm or applaud them they are about to be corrected or challenged. This is not always the case.

Action Step: Find a mentee or be a mentor. Let's live to make another person's life more meaningful and productive. Live life as a model for others. Be so successful in what you do that others want to be more like you or at least glean from you.

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Mentor and Mentee relationships #2

8/16/2018

Yesterday, I introduced the subject of mentoring and a mentee. Today, I'd like to look at the style of mentoring that Moses used. Moses offers Joshua opportunities to develop. He assigned him (along with 11 other men) to spy out the Promised Land. The mentor gave him a job that required a plan, teamwork, and a report (Numbers 13:16). Moses probably also provided some suggestions for how to carry out this plan.

Moses and Joshua (Mentor and Mentee) aptly illustrate a successful mentoring partnership. Moses demonstrated the wisdom of a mentor by deciding to delegate an important task (Exodus 17:9). He placed one of his soldiers, Joshua, in command of a battle with the Amalekites over a water dispute. In making this decision, Moses demonstrated trust in Joshua’s gifts and leadership potential. He opened the way for their ongoing teamwork. This is the first time this “mentor” asked someone else to lead an attack, one of many that his “mentee” Joshua would command.

We find evidence that their mutual trust increased when Moses allowed his mentee to accompany him to an important meeting . . . with none other than God! (Exodus 24:13-14) We’re not sure that Joshua was actually with Moses in the presence of the Lord, but we know for certain that he was on the mountain (Exodus 32:17) and talked with Moses on their return to the camp. Imagine the incredible lessons Joshua received that day!

Moses took Joshua to another meeting in a special tent where Moses spoke with God again. Joshua chose to stay at the tent after Moses left to return to camp (Exodus 33:11). Joshua remained on his own in the presence of God. Moses demonstrated significant trust by not interfering in this major opportunity for Joshua.

Moses continued to offer Joshua opportunities to develop. He assigned him (along with 11 other men) to spy out the Promised Land. The mentor gave him a job that required a plan, teamwork, and a report (Numbers 13:16). Moses probably also provided some suggestions for how to carry out this plan.

Finally, Moses affirmed his mentee by commissioning Joshua in the presence of the people of Israel (Deuteronomy 31:7-8). He gave Joshua public recognition for the lessons he learned. What’s more, Moses conferred power on his mentee, and vacated his position to him. Their formal mentoring relationship ended. When Moses died, Joshua was appointed as the new leader of Israel and later took his people into the Promised Land (Numbers 27:15-23).

Moses provided a great lesson in how to transfer leadership. A time comes to either step aside to allow our successors to lead in our place, or allow them to move on to a place of leadership elsewhere. Moses gave the proper direction, teaching, and recognition to prepare Joshua to fulfill his role in life.

The mentoring relationship of Moses and Joshua was very task-and- performance oriented. They provide clear-cut illustrations of several excellent mentor activities:

assigning the mentee preliminary stretch tasks;
depending on the mentee’s initial performance, making additional assignments requiring more skills and responsibilities;
inviting him (or her) to key events;
allowing the mentee to observe the mentor in action;
affirming the mentee for achievements; and stepping aside to let the mentee succeed.

Action Step: Find a Mentor and be a Mentor. Teach what you know and learn what you don't know yet! Be a good Mentee and honor your Mentor's time and personhood. The greatest honor is being able to do the same for others.

Mentor~Mentees relationships.

8/15/2018

Although the Bible doesn’t use the words mentor, mentee, or mentoring, it frequently refers to what we believe are successful mentoring relationships: Jesus and His disciples, Barnabas and Paul, Paul and Timothy, Naomi and Ruth, Elijah and Elisha, Moses and Joshua, Deborah and Barak, Elizabeth and Mary (the mother of Jesus), and many others. All are powerful examples of pairs and the God-inspired actions they took to help each other develop.

Moses and Joshua (Mentor and Mentee) aptly illustrate a successful mentoring partnership. Moses demonstrated the wisdom of a mentor by deciding to delegate an important task (Exodus 17:9). He placed one of his soldiers, Joshua, in command of a battle with the Amalekites over a water dispute. In making this decision, Moses demonstrated trust in Joshua’s gifts and leadership potential. He opened the way for their ongoing teamwork. This is the first time this “mentor” asked someone else to lead an attack, one of many that his “mentee” Joshua would command.

Did they sit down and negotiate this developmental relationship, calling each other mentor and mentee? Probably not. It’s more likely that Moses wasn’t cognizant of applying mentoring principles and didn’t necessarily
regard Joshua as his mentee. Yet the ingredients of mentoring were there, and Joshua entered a relationship with a respected man that changed Joshua’s life forever.

Action Step: Who can you reach out to and lend a helping hand? Are you feeding yourself so you have something to feed others? Ask the Lord what His plans are for you and how can you be a part of helping others reach their destiny?

More tomorrow...

Saying "Good-Bye" and finding lost things.

8/14/2018

Many of you that follow me, know that I adore my grandsons, and rarely do I get them for any length of time due to our busy schedules. With school starting, I made the decision that I was going to keep our eldest one over night for a couple days, regardless of how busy we were. It was the weekend of Women of Witness, and Men of Honor, as well as services at both of our churches. We juggled having a four year old wonderfully. We enjoyed him and he had a wonderful time, which included fishing and two trips to Sweet Frog, (and yes he ate the FROG!) Oh, and I don't know how my daughter trained him, but he never got anything on him. I think I need to send her Dad over to her.

The employees of Sweet Frog are more than wonderful. I saw kids drop their bowls and the employees just give them a new one, they mopped up spills, and helped the elderly. I was amazed at their Servant hearts. Then, I remembered that I had lost a package two weeks earlier and had thought perhaps I had lost it there. I had a lot of packages and this one was small, so I guessed it had fallen out on my way to the car. However, I simply asked. They had it! Not only did they have it but the bag still had the receipt, and the item in it and they said, "We never throw anything out. We have lots of things people leave behind." They showed me baby strollers, baby dolls, and on the items went. They care about people and lost things.

God was speaking. I wasn't listening. His voice is sometimes, heard too late. He cares about the little things. He cares about our feelings. He cares about the lost. He wants to talk to us. He knows what's important to us. We need to be more like Him.

The weekend came to a close and we returned him to his parents, Sunday morning at church. It was the normal busy Sunday morning, and we had ask a couple to go to lunch with us following services. Being we have two services, and they attend the first one, we wanted to hurry to meet them at the Restaurant following the second service. It was also "Back to School" Sunday, when we pray over all of our students, both young and old, that are returning to classes. Needless to say, we ran a little late getting out, and making it to the restaurant. (Most pastors do...) The point I want to make is, we did not tell our four year old grandson, "Good-Bye". We figured he would understand, and that once he was reunited with his Daddy and family, he wouldn't even notice. He did. He noticed big time. He told his Aunt, "Nonna and Dida didn't tell me good-bye. Where are they? They didn't just leave?" Well, yes we did, and it hurt his feelings. Needless to say, when we found out we apologized and made things right.

James 5:16 "Therefore, confess your sins to one another, and pray for one another so that you may be healed The effective prayer of a righteous man can accomplish much.

1 John 1:9 "If we confess our sins, He is faithful and righteous to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness."

Action Step: Teach by example. If you need to tell someone you are sorry? Do it now! Do not wait another day. We need to remember that children, are just little people. They have feelings too. We need to consider their feelings, and if we have hurt them, we need to appropriately apologize. Repenting to Christ is how we get saved, and become part of the family of God. Take the time. They King of the Universe left Heaven to come to earth to find you, to find me. He would do what He did, for just one. I am sure He is a lot busier than you, or I. So, let's slow down and take the time to treat one another with consideration. After all--we are all children at heart, and children of God.

We are a family.

8/13/2018

It is the smallest things that go un-noticed. My four year old grandson sat down at the table to eat watermelon with my husband and I, (lovingly referred to as Nonna and Dida). Nonna is Italian for Grandma and Dida is Croatian for Grandfather. So, we start to pray and my little grandson says, "This is great. We are having family dinner together." My husband and I just looked at one another and thought, yes we are. To us it was normal. We knew what we were doing, but his little mind just put it all together that we are family. He was seeing a bigger picture than just Mommy, Daddy and his little brother "Pie" as he refers to his little brother. Lights came on for him as he was seeing what was there all along but not understood by him.

I remember my grandparents well. They were like parents to me because both of my parents worked. I knew we were family. I was with them all summer long. We visited every weekend. This was my normal. Grandpa took me to the garden to help carry in dinner. Grandma let me do dishes (actually play in soapy water until my hearts content). I don't ever remember either of my grandparents raising their voices. They never told me go play. I had no bad memories of my grandparents, until years later when grandma began to drink too much. We were family. I miss them till this day. I want to model for my grand children what my grandparents were to me.

Action Step: What kind of model are you for the little children in your life? Does your stability give them stability? Do they know you are family, and family time is precious? Is there anyone around you that doesn't have family that you could adopt into your family, if in actions only? Reach out to create family.

Ephesians 5:1 "He predestined us to adoption as sons through Jesus Christ to Himself, according to the kind intention of His will,"

Teachable moments!

8/10/2018

I always learn something when my grandson comes to visit. He looks through all the cabinets, searches through the refrigerator, finds all the new things in the house, and checks to be sure his toys are where he left them. Man was created to survey his world.

When he opened the cabinets he stuck his hand in one and yelped, and jumped back. He came and sat down at the table with a solemn look on his face. Of course I knew what had happened, but he never spoke a word. Then, I asked him, "What happened? Did you get your fingers hurt in the trap?" "Yes", he said. We proceeded to give him a lesson on the whys and hows of mouse traps, using a pencil. (You should have seen his eyes when the pencil broke.)

Sometimes we are like my grandson. We put our fingers where they don't belong. We find ourselves snapped by life and wonder why we are hurting. We don't understand why we are experiencing pain. The trap was not set by God to hurt us. The devil sets up traps to take us out. It is the devil that comes to steal, kill and destroy. God in His word tells us that "...my people perish for lack of knowledge."

Once we had a discussion with our little man about the why's and how's of mouse traps, we knew he was safe from the the mouse traps forever. In actuality, it was one we had long forgotten about. I called the exterminator and we hadn't thought about that trap. Which reminds us how the devil leaves traps around our life in hopes that we will forget about them. The devil hopes no one will teach us about mouse traps. But, people who love people teach people.

Action Step: Today take advantage of every opportunity that life affords us. Whether it is your grandchild or the teenager, or the next door neighbors kid--don't leave them vulnerable to the traps of the devil. Teachable moments are for all ages and those that fail to teach are failing to change the life of others, which means others are bound to repeat their mistakes and continue to experience pain. Let's show love for others by patiently teaching.

Why we just don't get it? #4 The water grave and the new birth.

8/9/2018

Today, I want to share with you on the subject of baptism. Baptism means we are all in, literally. We go into a water grave totally submerged in Christ death, and totally risen as a new person (new birth) to live as Christ. When Jesus came up out of the water He came up with a new power and authority!

We that belong to the Household of Faith—those that have experienced the POWER OF SALVATION—are connected to the life, and favor of God that contains wealth, and promotion, and all that is needed to sustain life, and that life abundantly. We died with Christ and we were raised with Christ for the purposes of reigning on this earth, and in heaven with Him.

We obtain salvation the same way we obtain honor, in the fact we must humble ourselves in both cases.

Proverbs 15:33 (KJV) “The fear of the Lord is the instruction of wisdom; and before honour is humility.”

A Shumanite woman built a room on her house for the man of God. People that do not have the "Power of Salvation" in their life, do not do that sort of thing. It is an honorable thing, it takes humility. However, that power saved her son, or that act let the "Power" flow into her life that created another life (a son), and then when that son died, that same power brought him back to life. How much more power is available to us now that Christ has risen from the dead? Are we operating in that power? Do we allow the power of the new birth to flow through us? Not just in healing but in finances, promotions, deliverances, etc.?

Where there is honor life flows. Where there is dishonor life ceases.

Ananias and Saphira dishonored God and both died. Life ceased to flow. Nabel refused to honor David and lost his life and his wife. Honor takes action!

Honor is not what I know, it is what I do!

Action Step: Begin to honor those that God has placed in your life. Children honor your parents because life flowed from them, to you. This commandment to honor our parents comes with the promise of long life and favor. This is a principle. Honor your spouse and watch what happens. Honor your children. Honor the person who writes your paycheck and watch what happens. Honor the spiritual authority in your life and watch what happens.

If we believe the Word of God we will "DO" the Word of God! Let's do this thing!!!

Why we just don't get it #3 Salvation Is By Grace (Undeserved Mercy), Not Works.

8/8/2018

I am not always so teachy nor do I usually use so much scripture, however today is 8/8/18. Numbers always mean a lot to me. The number 8 has to do with "New Beginnings". There is no greater new beginning than that of being born again. By born again I am referring to being born of the Spirit. If you already know Jesus as your Lord and Savior then tuck these away for a time when the Lord would have you share them with someone. Or go ahead. Forward this to someone you care about.

We were all born sinners because we were all born of Adam. We all have a past that in order for it to be just that, our past--we must do something to change the present. This means no matter how good I am, or how much good I do, I can not save myself, nor change my future. I needed a Savior. Jesus is the savior of the world. I made Him my personal savior. As I grew in my faith I later made Him my Lord. Check out these scriptures to help you understand why we needed a savior or check them out so you can share them with a loved one.

(Romans 3:23) "For all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God."
(Ecclesiastes 7:20) "For there is not a just man upon earth, that doeth good, and sinneth not."
(Isaiah 64:6) "But we are all as an unclean thing, and all our righteousnesses are as filthy rags; and we all do fade as a leaf; and our iniquities, like the wind, have taken us away."
(Romans 3:10) "As it is written, There is none righteous, no, not one:"
(James 2:10) "For whosoever shall keep the whole law, and yet offend in one point, he is guilty of all."
(1John.1:8) "If we say that we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us."

(Ephesians 2:8,9 ) "For by grace are ye saved through faith; and that not of yourselves: it is the gift of God: 9 Not of works, lest any man should boast."
(Mark 10:25-27) " It is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle, than for a rich man to enter into the kingdom of God. {26} And they were astonished out of measure, saying among themselves, Who then can be saved? {27} And Jesus looking upon them saith, With men it is impossible, but not with God: for with God all things are possible."
(Romans 3:20) "Therefore by the deeds of the law there shall no flesh be justified in his sight: for by the law is the knowledge of sin."
(Romans 11:6) "And if by grace, then is it no more of works: otherwise grace is no more grace. But if it be of works, then is it no more grace: otherwise work is no more work."
(Galatians 2:16) "Knowing that a man is not justified by the works of the law, but by the faith of Jesus Christ, even we have believed in Jesus Christ, that we might be justified by the faith of Christ, and not by the works of the law: for by the works of the law shall no flesh be justified."
(2 Timothy 1:9) "Who hath saved us, and called us with an holy calling, not according to our works, but according to his own purpose and grace, which was given us in Christ Jesus before the world began,"
(Titus 3:5) "Not by works of righteousness which we have done, but according to his mercy he saved us, by the washing of regeneration, and renewing of the Holy Ghost;"

Once we understand these scriptures it is easy to see how much Jesus loves us. Once we are loved it is easier to admit our shortcomings and reach our to receive the gift of salvation. This gift guarantees that you will never be extinct--you will live forever in eternity with Jesus, among so many other things that I want to share with you.

Why we just don't get it. #2 Included in Christ.

8/7/2018

Ephesians 1:13 (Message) And you also were included in Christ when you heard the message of truth, the gospel of your salvation. When you believed, you were marked in him with a seal, the promised Holy Spirit,

Yesterday, I talked about one of the many reasons we don't get the full revelation of our salvation. Today, I continue along those same lines. We don't realize what sealed with the promised Holy Spirit, or to be included in Christ actually means and entitles us to. Let's look at what it means to be included in Christ.

Galatians 3:26-28 gives us insight into the phrase “in Christ” and what it means. "In Christ Jesus you are all children of God through faith, for all of you who were baptized into Christ have clothed yourselves with Christ. There is neither Jew nor Gentile, neither slave nor free, nor is there male and female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus." Paul is speaking to the Christians in Galatia, reminding them of their new identity since they placed their faith in Jesus Christ. To be "baptized into Christ" means that they were identified with Christ, having left their old sinful lives and fully embracing the new life in Christ (Mark 8:34; Luke 9:23). When we respond to the Holy Spirit's drawing, He "baptizes" us into the family of God. First Corinthians 12:13 says, "For we were all baptized by one Spirit so as to form one body—whether Jews or Gentiles, slave or free—and we were all given the one Spirit to drink."

Christ lives on the inside of me and I live on the inside of Him. He lives inside of you and you in Him, if you have asked Him to be your Savior, and Lord. Where He goes I go, and what He can do, I can do. We are one, and when I made Him my Lord, I made Him my master. He calls the shots. Because, I am part of His Body, I can't just detach myself and go where I want, and do as I please. No, I am connected. I am part of His Body. He is the vine. I am the branch. We are connected. The power of Christ flows through me, as sure as the life of that vine flows through the branches.

Action Step: Today start seeing yourself in Christ and seeing Him inside of you. Everywhere you go, wherever He is needed let Him flow out of you. In ever circumstance allow the power and presence of God to flow through you into those that need a touch, and the presence of God to come on the scene.

Join me tomorrow when we talk about being marked with a seal.

Why we just don't get it. #1-Because we fail to know we are loved.

8/6/2018

1 John 4:4 (KJV) "Ye are of God, little children, and have overcome them: because greater is He that is in you, than he that is in the world."

When we focus on the here and now, we can become so overcome by all that we see and feel. But we are not to live by what we see and feel, but by every word that proceeds from the mouth of God. The Word of God found within 66 books, written by over 40 authors who were divinely inspired by the Spirit of God are love letters written to you and written to me. Don't feel very loved? Read His letters to you. Just keep reading with the idea that you know nothing. Forget about what you were taught. Study the word yourself and let the Holy Spirit lead you!

Today, right here at the beginning of a new week, the first full week of a new month take a deep breather, and start a new. Forget about what is behind you, and look at what could be ahead of you. Perhaps, you have tried and failed. Many who have done great things tried and failed over, and over, and over again. However, they tried just one more time, and this time they succeeded. God wants you to win! The world wants to see someone win. The world wants to know if its true? Are we children of God? Does the greater one live on the inside of us? Does the Word work? YES! YES! YES! If you and I will work the Word the Word will work. The greater one lives on the inside of us!

Action Step: Today, start doing something different. You want a different experience then you have got to start doing something differently. I challenge you to get into the word of God and let that Word get down on the inside of you. Don't worry about reading the entire Bible. Just start reading Romans. When you are finished, start reading Romans over again. Then, do it again. Do it until you know the true meaning of Salvation and all that God has done for you. You will change. You will want to give God honor and honor will change your life.

Come see me right here tomorrow. I have so much more to share with you.